Former President Donald Trump roasted Democrats in a hilarious speech at the 2024 Alfred E. Smith Memorial Foundation Dinner in New York City. Glenn reviews some of the best moments, including Trump's jabs at Tim Walz, Chuck Schumer, Michael Bloomberg, and Kamala Harris. Plus, he reacts to an unexpected moment where comedian Jim Gaffigan acknowledged that the Democrats staged a "coup" against President Biden. And perhaps even more surprising was the response from CNN's Brian Stelter to Trump's speech ...

Transcript

Below is a rush transcript that may contain errors

GLENN: Jim Gaffigan was -- was the host. I can't see Jim Gaffigan now, and not think of Tim Walz.

STU: It is a really funny impersonation. I mean, they don't give him any funny lines because they don't want to make fun of Walz.

But he just does the part so well. It's so frenetic and bizarre, which is just what Tim Walz is.

GLENN: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So he makes fun -- he was at the Al Smith charity dinner. That's the white tie dinners that the presidents always go to, and everybody in New York always goes to. You know, that has lots and lots and lots of money.

And they raise money for Catholic Charities. And this is the first time since Mondale that both candidates have not been there. And Mondale, of course, you know, lost.

I don't know if it's a God thing. Could be. I don't know.

But Kamala Harris decided not to show up.

And Jim Gaffigan, bless his little heart.
He took on both sides hard, which is exactly what a comedian should do. Here he is making fun of the Democrats last night.

JIM: The Democrats have been telling us Trump. Trump's reelection is a threat to democracy.

In fact, they were so concerned of this threat, they staged a coup.
(laughter)
Ousted their democratically elected incumbent and installed Kamala Harris.

In other words, all her dreams have come true. Really? It really makes you consider the power of prayer, right? Sometimes prayers take three and a half years, and a George Clooney op-ed.
(laughter)
He is funny. He is very, very funny.

Now, Trump is pretty funny himself. I mean, he's obviously -- he didn't want to do this.

He said, at the end, he just wanted to go up.

He said, I don't think anything is funny right now. The country is on fire, our liberties are at stake.

And he said, I just wanted to come up here and talk about that. But all of my advisers said, no, don't do that. Do comedy.

And he said, last time. And four years ago. He said, when I came here. He said, I did a roast.

And, Stu, you and I know, what it's like to do a roast.

Because you helped me write a roast that I did in New York with all of the superpowers. It was a dinner very much like this. And it was a roast, and nobody was roasting.

Everybody was telling like cute little stories. And taking soft little jabs.

And I looked at the guy. I was sitting next to him at the dais. And I looked at the guy we were roasting, and I said, might have made a huge mistake.

Because these guys are not roasting you. And all my material tears you apart. And he just laughed. And he said, that's why I wanted you to here. I knew you would have the guts to do it.

But apparently, four years ago, I don't remember this. But he appeared mean. At least, that's what he said.

And he said, I didn't want to repeat that. But he -- he -- he did some funny things.

Here he is, roasting Schumer. Cut one.

DONALD: Very, very strong. A certain way. I won't tell you what that is. But Chuck Schumer is here, looking very glum.

He looks glum. But, look, Chuck, considering how woke your party has become, if Kamala loses, you still have a chance to become the first woman president.
(laughter)

GLENN: Did you watch this at all, Stu?

STU: Only the highlights. Came out on X and stuff. Yeah. It was pretty funny.

GLENN: Yeah. I was watching it too. Didn't Chuck Schumer. He looked like Gollum.

STU: Yeah. He does look very strange at this point. Posture.

GLENN: Yeah. His posture. And he was sitting. And he just looks like, my precious. He really looks like Gollum. But maybe that's just me. Here's Trump talking about the white dudes for Harris.

DONALD: There's a group called white Dudes for Harris. Have you seen this? White Dudes for Harris. Anybody know it? Some of you here, white dudes for -- that doesn't sound like it.

But I'm not worried about them at all, because their wives and their wives' lovers are all voting for me.
(laughter)
Every one of those people are voting for me.

GLENN: On Tim Walz. Here's what the president said.

DONALD: But unfortunately Governor Walz isn't here himself, but don't worry, he'll say that he was.
(laughter)

GLENN: Did you also notice Michael Bloomberg was sitting right in the front? And the guy didn't react or crack a smile, one time?

Honestly, it -- it was the weirdest thing. Not a single smile, nothing.

No reaction. Good or bad.

STU: That's the spirit of the event. Yeah. The spirit of the event is to go there, and you laugh at yourself.

That's what the event is.

GLENN: Bloomberg did.

STU: It was interesting to watch. Because you're right. Schumer who can at times, would like squirm and roll his eyes. But that's an okay reaction at that type of event. It is.

Gaffigan, actually as well, laughed really hard at some of the jokes.

Others that were the female president one.

He just didn't want to react to that one at all.

GLENN: Right. But generally speaking, I thought everyone was pretty much okay on their reactions.

But Bloomberg was just nothing.

GLENN: He was -- it was weird.

It was just weird.

It was like, are you listening to a podcast? Or something, right now?

What is happening with you?

STU: He was that famous footage of the interrogation of one of the murder suspects. Who just sits there, in the room by themself, for hours. And never has a facial expression.

You ever seen that footage? It's like that. Oh, yeah. It's classic. Classic.

GLENN: So weird. He also talked seriously about the assassination attempts.

Here he is. Cut four.

Having recently, myself survived two assassination attempts.

I survived. I have a chart that went down to the right. Fortunately, I looked -- that's my all-time favorite piece of paper, but it went down. And I looked to the right. And I said, you know, was that luck? Well, was that luck, or was that God that did that? And I think that it was God that did that. I do. I do.

But I have a very fresh -- I have a very fresh appreciation for how blessed we are by God's providences and his divine mercy. I mean, that was something -- I was not supposed to be here tonight. That, I can tell you.

So with God's help, I know there's nothing that cannot be achieved. We can achieve so much good with this country and get together and unify.

GLENN: I thought that was -- I thought that was a really great sentiment.

There was a night, that you're supposed to laugh at each other, and then come together at the end.

Which I thought he tried to do. Except for maybe de Blasio. He took on de Blasio. And it wasn't funny at all. He was serious. And he's like, this isn't a joke. He sucked. He was the worst. He destroyed this city. Did you see that?

STU: No.

GLENN: Stu. Oh, my gosh. It was -- he was talking about all the former mayors. But the worst one. And he's up here. And it's not you, Michael Bloomberg.

It's de Blasio. And he just tore him apart. You could tell it was -- you could tell that you Trump was a New Yorker.

And loves New York. And really didn't appreciate de Blasio, at all.

But here's -- here's -- you want to -- I want to end with miracles.

Because Donald Trump was talking about that.

And it was a night of miracles. Especially if you're watching CNN. Here's Brian Stelter on CNN.

VOICE: Brian Stelter, what did you make of this performance?

VOICE: I thought he was funny. I thought he actually got a few great jokes in. I thought the pest moment, was when he talked about the assassination attempts, and made light of what he's experienced. Because I think he's experiencing real trauma. Real PTSD as a result of the shootings, but he's still able to have a light moment in this room. And he took advantage of the fact that Kamala Harris wasn't there.

GLENN: What? That's Brian Stelter.

I mean, what this guy won't do to have a job, is amazing.

Because that's not his opinion.

It's clearly not his opinion.

Or maybe his -- you know, die hard hate for Trump. And Trump can never do anything right.

Maybe that wasn't his opinion.

I don't know what his opinion is. But that's a complete turnaround for Brian Stelter.

STU: Well, I think it was objectively funny at times.

GLENN: When has he been objective?

STU: Well, I mean, it's easy to -- again. It's easy to be objective, on a moment like that, I feel like.

You know, Jim Gaffigan is really funny.

But he does not like Donald Trump at all. He's a liberal. He's not a fan. But he was able to laugh. Right?

At some of those jokes.

Because they're objectively funny.

It's supposed to be what that event is.

It's more of a throwback to the old times. Where you can actually admit things that are accurate. Trump is objectively funny at times.

There's just no -- that's just true. It's just true.

And you should be able to admit it. And I'll give credit to Stelter for admitting it.

I don't know that anybody else on the panel would do such a thing.

GLENN: He is really funny. And he has no problem making fun of himself last night. Last night, he said, you know, they told me, I should do some self-deprecating jokes. But I've got nothing. I've got nothing.

But he does. I mean, here he is making fun of himself on SNL. Cut nine, please.

VOICE: The guy is here to fix the leak on your solid gold faucet.

DONALD: Send them in.
(laughter)

GLENN: Now, he's as a janitor.

VOICE: I'm the prince of this city, when you're in my office, you treat me with respect.

DONALD: Who did your decorating? Saddam Hussein?

VOICE: I'll have you know, this is all very classy stuff. And that painting of the tiger and the woman has gotten me laid on numerous occasions.

DONALD: I didn't know that gay dudes liked tiger paintings.

VOICE: Hey, you've crossed the line. I've killed people for less.

DONALD: Looks like you killed a squirrel to me, and put it right on top of your head.
(laughter)

VOICE: You're one to talk. Your hair looks exactly like mine.

DONALD: Yeah. Except my hair is supposed to look like this. I'm a janitor.
(laughter)

STU: That's from 2004, by the way.

GLENN: He's funny.