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Glenn Asks 'Google Home' the Most Important Question Ever

January 06, 2017
Staff

WRITER

With smart technology like Google Home and Alexa in your home, critical information is only a request away. This incredible voice recognition technology was put to the test Friday on The Glenn Beck Program, when Glenn asked Google Home perhaps the most important question the device will ever receive.

"Okay Google, how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?" Glenn asked.

What answer did Google Home give?

"Let's investigate why a woodchuck might chuck would. Possibly as a defense mechanism. Woodchucks are large rodents, afraid of many other animals," Google Home replied.

Not exactly the answer Glenn was looking for. How about Alexa? Did she come up with the goods?

"A woodchuck would chuck all the wood he could chuck, if the woodchuck could chuck wood," Alexa said.

Read below or listen to the full segment for more hilarious questions and answers.

 

 

Below is a rush transcript of this segment, it might contain errors:

GLENN: Ok Google, how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

VOICE: Let's investigate why a woodchuck might chuck would. Possibly as a defense mechanism. Woodchucks are large rodents, afraid of many other animals.

GLENN: Ok Google, that didn't answer the question.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

VOICE: Sorry. I don't know how to help with that.

JEFFY: Oh.

PAT: Huh.

JEFFY: Alexa, how much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

VOICE: A woodchuck would chuck all the wood he could chuck, if the woodchuck could chuck wood.

GLENN: No, that's not the answer to the question.

PAT: What?

GLENN: Ok Google, is there any study that proves how much wood a woodchuck could chuck wood if a woodchuck could chuck wood, or something like that?

VOICE: Here's some information for how much wood can a woodchuck chuck answer: According to Quora.com, according to a Cornell publication, the answer is approximately 700 pounds. Excerpt, how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

PAT: Over how long a period of time?

GLENN: That's off of Quora.

PAT: That's pretty cool.

GLENN: That fast finding it on Quora.

PAT: That's amazing. Wow. I mean, I think we have a winner, don't we? Ask them both to play Michael Buble.

GLENN: Of course, they can.

PAT: Ask Alexa to play Michael Buble.

JEFFY: Alexa, can you play Michael Buble?

VOICE: I can't find songs by Michael Buble. To hear artist stations, link your iHeartRadio account using the Alexa app.

PAT: Yeah, it has to have access to something. You got to download it or --

GLENN: Ok Google, can you play Michael Buble?

VOICE: Sure. Check out this Michael Buble radio mix on Google Play music.

(music)

PAT: That is awesome.

GLENN: Wow. Ok Google, stop.

PAT: That is awesome.

GLENN: Wow.

JEFFY: It's playing the mixes though. So you still have to download some of the --

PAT: So.

GLENN: So wait. So was that not him?

JEFFY: Yes. But specific songs.

GLENN: Ok Google, play Michael Buble.

VOICE: Sure.

GLENN: Listen to this. We were all talking over each other, and it still --

PAT: It still did it (music).

GLENN: This is amazing. The end of the world is here.

JEFFY: It's the end of the world.

GLENN: This is the end of civilization. No, this is amazing technology.

PAT: Yeah.

(music)

GLENN: Oh. It's not Michael Buble. That's Frank.

PAT: It's the radio --

GLENN: Shut up.

PAT: You'll get some Michael Buble. You'll get Frank Sinatra. It's the radio mix.

GLENN: Ok Google, who is Glenn Beck? Watch this. Watch me mess with her --

VOICE: According to Wikipedia, Glenn Lee Beck is an American television and radio host, conservative political commentator, author, television network producer, filmmaker, and entrepreneur.

PAT: They even made you sound fairly --

JEFFY: I know.

GLENN: Watch this.

Ok Google, is Glenn Beck a racist?

VOICE: Here's a summary from Mother Jones: Glenn Beck's greatest racist hits. He says the rally is supposed to honor Americans in uniform, as well as those who embody our nation's founding principles --

GLENN: Ok Google, stop. That didn't answer the question.

Ok Google, is Glenn Beck a racist?

VOICE: Here's a summary from Mother Jones.

GLENN: Ok Google, stop. No Mother Jones. Answer the question, is Glenn Beck a racist?

VOICE: Sorry, I don't understand.

PAT: Hmm.

GLENN: It's quite easy.

Ok Google, without using Mother Jones as your source, can you tell me if Glenn Beck is a racist?

VOICE: My apologies, I don't understand.

GLENN: Wow.

PAT: You stumped it there.

GLENN: Stumped it.

PAT: Stumped it there, yeah.

JEFFY: Huh.

GLENN: Kind of like the rest of the country.

JEFFY: Alexa, is Glenn Beck a racist?

GLENN: That sucks, man.

PAT: Wow. Nothing.

GLENN: Nothing. Give it again.

JEFFY: Alexa, is Glenn Beck a racist? Something is wrong.

GLENN: Do your old man voice. Alexa, is Glenn Beck a racist!

JEFFY: It's working.

VOICE: Sorry, I didn't understand the question.

PAT: That's pretty bad.

GLENN: At least she hears. Is this the one you have?

PAT: I have the bigger version of the Alexa thing.

JEFFY: Yeah, there's a bigger one.

PAT: And I have found it's mostly worthless. I mean, it does simple things. Like what's the weather outside. You know, that kind of stuff.

GLENN: Alexa, what's the current temperature?

VOICE: Right now, in Irving, it's 35 degrees with mostly cloudy skies. Tonight's forecast has clouds, with a low of 24 --

JEFFY: Alexa, stop.

GLENN: Ok Google, what's the temperature outside?

VOICE: The temperature in Irving is 34.

GLENN: That's all I wanted. That's all I wanted.

If I wanted more -- okay, Alexa. What's the barometric pressure?

VOICE: In Irving, it's 35 degrees with mostly cloudy skies.

JEFFY: Thank you.

PAT: That's not the barometric pressure.

GLENN: That's Alexa too.

Ok Google, what's the barometric pressure?

VOICE: According to the Weather Channel, atmospheric pressure can also be measured in (inaudible), roughly equivalent to one atmosphere of pressure. One bar is equivalent to 29.6.

JEFFY: That's not it though.

PAT: Ask it what the current barometric pressure is.

GLENN: Ok Google, what is the current barometric pressure?

VOICE: Sorry, I don't know how to help with that yet.

JEFFY: Oh, see. Oh, yeah, it's so much better.

GLENN: Wow. Wow.

PAT: Not a lot of people searching for barometric pressure.

GLENN: Ok Google, when will you know the barometric pressure for Irving?

VOICE: Sorry, I can't help with that yet.

GLENN: Wow.

PAT: That's --

GLENN: Ok Google, when will self-driving cars be the norm?

VOICE: Sorry, I don't understand.

GLENN: Oh, I bet you don't.

(laughter)

GLENN: Ok Google, when will artificial intelligence become the norm?

VOICE: Sorry, I don't know how to help with that yet.

PAT: You might be confusing it with the Norm. That might be tough.

GLENN: Yeah. Ok Google, when will artificial intelligence be in standard use?

VOICE: Sorry, I'm not sure how to help with that.

PAT: Ask it when it will be developed.

GLENN: Ok Google, when will artificial intelligence be fully developed?

VOICE: My apologies. I don't understand.

GLENN: Wow.

PAT: They're hiding that from us. Because it is Google who is doing it.

GLENN: Google is doing it.

Ok Google, who is Ray Kurzweil?

VOICE: According to Wikipedia, Raymond Kurzweil is an American author, computer scientist, inventor, and futurist.

PAT: The voice is much smoother too with Ok Google than it is with Alexa, right? I mean, it doesn't sound as computer-ish.

GLENN: Alexa, state the alphabet.

VOICE: I wasn't able to understand the question I heard.

GLENN: Alexa, repeat the Russian alphabet!

PAT: It just shut off. It's like, "No, I'm not going to do that. Sorry."

GLENN: What the -- Ok Google. Give me the Russian alphabet.

VOICE: Here's a summary from Russian Language Lessons. Learn Russian for free. The Russian alphabet is also known as the Cyrillic alphabet. Here is what the Russian alphabet looks like. Now, let's have a look at these letters in detail.

GLENN: Well, I can't see them.

Ok Google, can you --

JEFFY: Comes up on the app.

VOICE: I found --

GLENN: Ok Google, is Vladimir Putin a good guy or a bad guy?

VOICE: Sorry, I'm not sure how to help with that. But I'm trying to learn.

GLENN: Oh, he'll teach you too. Ok Google, shut up. Thank you for that.

The Deep State's NEW plan to backstab Trump

Brandon Bell / Staff | Getty Images

We cannot make the same mistake we made in 2016 — celebrating victory while the deep state plots its next move.

In 2016, Donald Trump shocked the world by defeating Hillary Clinton. Conservatives cheered, believing we’d taken back the reins of our country. But we missed the bigger battle. We failed to recognize the extent of the damage caused by eight years of Barack Obama and decades of progressive entrenchment. The real war isn’t won at the ballot box. It’s being waged against an insidious force embedded deep within our institutions: the administrative state, or the “deep state.”

This isn’t a new problem. America’s founders foresaw it, though they didn’t have a term for “deep state” back in the 1700s. James Madison, in Federalist 48, warned us that combining legislative, executive, and judicial powers in the same hands is “the very definition of tyranny.” Yet today, that’s exactly where we stand. Unelected bureaucrats in agencies like the Environmental Protection Agency, the Department of Energy, and the Department of Justice hold more power than the officials we vote for. They control the levers of government with impunity, dictating policies and stifling change.

This is the fight for the soul of our nation. The founders’ vision of a constitutional republic is under siege.

We’ve felt the consequences of this growing tyranny firsthand. During COVID-19, so-called experts ran our lives, crushing civil liberties under the guise of public safety. Our intelligence agencies and justice system turned into weapons of political warfare, targeting a sitting president and his supporters. Meanwhile, actual criminals were given a pass, turning American cities into lawless war zones.

Thomas Jefferson wrote in 1816 that “the functionaries of every government have propensities to command at will the liberty and property of their constituents.” Today, we see Jefferson’s prophecy fulfilled. The deep state exercises unchecked power over our freedoms, and information itself is controlled by the fourth branch of government: the legacy media.

Even when we win elections, the deep state doesn’t concede defeat. It switches to survival mode. Trump’s first term proved this. Despite a historic mandate to dismantle the bureaucracy, the deep state fought back with everything it had: leaks, investigations, court rulings, and obstruction at every turn. And now, with the possibility of Trump returning to office, the deep state is preparing to do it again.

Progressives are laying out their attack plan — and they’re not even hiding it.

U.S. Rep. Wiley Nickel (D-N.C.) recently boasted about forming a “shadow cabinet” to govern alongside the deep state, regardless of who’s in the White House. Nickel called it “democracy’s insurance policy.” Let’s be clear: This isn’t insurance. It’s sabotage.

They’ll employ a “top down, bottom up, inside out” strategy to overwhelm and collapse any effort to reform the system. From the top, federal judges and shadow officials will block Trump’s every move. Governors in blue states like California and New York are gearing up to resist federal authority. During Trump’s first term, California filed over 100 lawsuits against his administration. Expect more of the same starting January 20.

From the bottom, progressive groups like the American Civil Liberties Union will flood the streets with protesters, much as they did to oppose Trump’s first-term immigration reforms. They’ve refined their tactics since 2016 and are prepared to unleash a wave of civil unrest. These aren’t spontaneous movements; they’re coordinated assaults designed to destabilize the administration.

Finally, from the inside, the deep state will continue its mission of self-preservation. Agencies will drag their feet, leak sensitive information, and undermine policies from within. Their goal is to make everything a chaotic mess, so the heart of their power — the bureaucratic core — remains untouched and grows stronger.

We cannot make the same mistake we made in 2016 — celebrating victory while the deep state plots its next move. Progressives never see themselves as losing. When they’re out of power, they simply shift tactics, pumping more blood into their bureaucratic heart. We may win elections, but the war against the deep state will only intensify. As George Washington warned in his Farewell Address, “Government is not reason, it is not eloquence — it is force; and force, like fire, is a dangerous servant and a fearful master.”

This is the fight for the soul of our nation. The founders’ vision of a constitutional republic is under siege. The deep state has shown us its plan: to govern from the shadows, circumventing the will of the people. But now that the shadows have been exposed, we have a choice. Will we accept this silent tyranny, or will we demand accountability and reclaim our nation’s heart?

The battle is just beginning. We can’t afford to lose.

Editor's Note: This article was originally published on TheBlaze.com.

Drone mystery exposes GLARING government incompetence

Gary Hershorn / Contributor | Getty Images

The drone issue is getting way out of hand.

Earlier this month, Glenn first reported on the mysterious drones stalking the night sky over New Jersey, but the situation is increasingly concerning as the sightings have escalated. Not only have drones been seen across the Northeast Coast, including over New York City, Maryland, and Pennsylvania, but recently, they have been spotted over the night skies of San Diego and other parts of Southern California.

It doesn't take an expert to identify the potential dangers and risks that dozens of undetectable, unidentified six-foot or larger drones pose to national security. Yet, our government's response has been one of unimaginable incompetence, leaving us to speculate on the origin and intention of these drones and wonder in astonishment at the government's ineptitude. Here are three examples of the government's lackluster response to the mystery drones:

Iranian Mothership and Missing Nuclear Warheads

- / Stringer | Getty Images

After several weeks of hubbub, New Jersey Representative, Jeff Van Drew gave an interview on Fox News where he claimed that the drones originated from an Iranian "mothership" off the East Coast of the United States. This theory has since been disproven by satellite images, which show that all Iranian drone carriers are far from U.S. shores. Another theory suggests that drones may be equipped with sensors capable of detecting nuclear material and that they are looking for a nuclear warhead that recently went missing! With these apocalyptic theories gaining traction in the absence of any real answer from our government, one can't help but question the motive behind the silence.

Pentagon's Limp Wristed Response

Alex Wong / Staff | Getty Images

In a recent press conference, national security spokesman John Kirby responded to reporters demanding answers about the government's lack of transparency, which has caused increasing public anxiety. He insisted that the drones did not pose a threat and were not assets of a foreign power, such as from Iran or China--even though he is still uncertain about their identity and origin. He also claimed that many of the sightings were simply misidentifications of normal aircraft.

This lackluster answer has only further inflamed national anxieties and raised even more questions. If the government is unsure of the identity of the drones, how do they know if they are a threat or if they aren't foreign assets? If they aren't foreign, does that mean they are U.S. assets? If so, why not just say so?

The Pentagon has also stated that they are leaving it up to local law enforcement to spearhead the investigation after concluding that these drones pose no threat to any military installation. This has left many feeling like the federal government has turned a blind eye to a serious issue that many Americans are very concerned about.

Where's Pete Buttigieg?

Chip Somodevilla / Staff | Getty Images

We are in the closing weeks of the Biden administration, and with the finish line in sight, Secretary of Transportation Pete Buttigieg probably figured nothing else could go wrong on his watch—but boy was he wrong. As Secretary of Transportation, Buttigieg is in charge of the FAA, the agency responsible for managing all air traffic across the nation. One would think that mysterious, 6-foot-long, seemingly intractable drones are invisible on radar and flying above major cities would pose a serious threat to the myriad of legal aircraft that traverse our skies. Yet, Buttigieg has been silent on the issue, adding another failure to his resume which includes: malfunctioning airplanes, the train derailment in Ohio, and the Baltimore Key Bridge collapse, just to name a few.

Glenn: How Alvin Bragg turned hero Daniel Penny into a villain

Michael M. Santiago / Staff | Getty Images

We cannot allow corrupt institutions to punish those who act to protect life and liberty.

America no longer has a single, shared understanding of justice. Two Americas now exist, each applying justice differently depending on who you are and where you live. One America, ruled by common sense and individual courage, praises heroes who stand up to protect others. The other, driven by political agendas and corrupted institutions, punishes those same heroes for daring to act.

This stark division couldn’t be clearer than in the case of Daniel Penny, the Marine whose trial in New York City this week drew strong reactions from both sides across the divided line of justice.

If we let this slide, we accept a world in which heroes are treated as criminals and the law is a weapon for ideological warfare.

Penny was on a subway train last year when Jordan Neely — a man suffering from severe mental illness and reportedly high on drugs — began threatening passengers, saying, “I’m going to kill you all.” The fear on that subway car was palpable, but nobody moved. Nobody, that is, until Penny did what needed to be done. He took action to protect innocent lives.

In the America many of us used to believe in, Penny’s response would be heralded as heroic. His actions mirrored the courage of Todd Beamer on Flight 93, who, on September 11, 2001, rallied others with the words, “Let’s roll,” to prevent further tragedy. But in New York, courage doesn’t seem to count anymore. There, the system turns heroes into villains.

Penny subdued Neely using a chokehold, intending only to restrain him, not kill him. Tragically, Neely died. Penny, filled with remorse, told the police he never meant to hurt anyone. Yet, instead of being recognized for protecting others from a clear and present threat, Penny stood trial for criminally negligent homicide.

In Alvin Bragg’s New York, justice bends to ideology. The Manhattan district attorney has made a career of weaponizing the law, selectively prosecuting those who don’t fit his narrative. He’s the same prosecutor who twisted legal precedent to go after Donald Trump on business charges no one had ever faced before. Then, he turned his sights on Daniel Penny.

A jury may have acquitted Penny, but what happened in New York City this week isn’t justice. When the rule of law changes depending on the defendant’s identity or the prosecutor's political motives, we’re no longer living in a free country. We’re living in a state where justice is a game, and ordinary Americans are the pawns.

The system failed Jordan Neely

It’s worth asking: Where were activists like Alvin Bragg when Neely was suffering on the streets? Jordan Neely was a tragic figure — a man with a long history of mental illness and over 40 arrests, including violent assaults. The system failed him long before he stepped onto that subway train. Yet rather than confront that uncomfortable truth, Bragg’s office decided to target the man who stepped in to prevent a tragedy.

This isn’t about justice. It’s about power. It’s about advancing a narrative where race and identity matter more than truth and common sense.

It’s time to demand change

The Daniel Penny case — and others like it — is a wake-up call. We cannot allow corrupt institutions to punish those who act to protect life and liberty. Americans must demand an end to politically driven prosecutions, hold DAs like Alvin Bragg accountable, and stand up for the principle that true justice is blind, consistent, and fair.

If we let this slide, we accept a world in which heroes are treated as criminals and the law is a weapon for ideological warfare. It’s time to choose which America we want to live in.

Editor's Note: This article was originally published on TheBlaze.com.

CEO Brian Thompson's killer reveals COWARDICE of the far-left death cult

Jeff Swensen / Stringer | Getty Images

Early on the chilly morning of Wednesday, December 4th, Brian Thompson, CEO of health insurance giant, UnitedHealthcare, was walking through Midtown Manhattan on his way to a company conference. Suddenly, a masked and hooded figure silently allegedly stepped onto the sidewalk behind Thompson, drew a 3-D printed, silenced pistol, and without warning fired multiple shots into Thompson's back before fleeing the scene on an electric bicycle. After a multiple-day manhunt, a 26-year-old lead suspect was arrested at a McDonald's in Altoona, Pennsylvania after being recognized by an employee.

This was not "vigilante justice." This was cold-blooded murder.

As horrific as the murder of a husband and father in broad daylight in the center of New York City is, the story only gets worse. Even before the murder suspect was arrested, left-wing extremists were already taking to X to call him a "hero" and a "vigilante" who "took matters into his own hands." Even the mainstream media joined in on the glorification, as Glenn pointed out on air recently, going out of the way to show how physically attractive the murder suspect was. This wave of revolting and nihilistic fanfare came in response to the findings of online investigators who surmised the murder suspect's motives to retaliate against healthcare companies for corruption and denied coverage. The murder suspect supposedly underwent a major back surgery that left him with back pain, and some of his internet fans apparently viewed his murder of Thompson as retribution for the mistreatment that he and many other Americans have suffered from healthcare companies.

The murder suspect and his lackeys don't seem to understand that, other than depriving two children of their father right before Christmas, he accomplished nothing.

The murder suspect failed to achieve his goal because he was too cowardly to try.

If the murder suspect's goals were truly to "right the wrongs" of the U.S. healthcare system, he had every tool available to him to do so in a constructive and meaningful manner. He came from a wealthy and prominent family in the Baltimore area, became the valedictorian at a prestigious all-boys prep school, and graduated from the University of Pennsylvania with a master's in engineering. Clearly, the murder suspect was intelligent and capable, and if he had put his talent into creating solutions for the healthcare industry, who knows what he could have accomplished?

This is the kind of behavior the far-left idolizes, like communists on college campuses who wear shirts that celebrate the brutal Cuban warlord, Che Guevara. Merchandise celebrating the UnitedHealthcare CEO murder suspect is already available, including shirts, hoodies, mugs, and even Christmas ornaments. Will they be sporting his face on their T-shirts too?

This macabre behavior does not breed creation, achievement, success, or life. It only brings death and risks more Americans falling into this dangerous paradigm. But we still have a chance to choose life. We just have to wake up and take it.